Nothing Nice To Say, Webisode 1
Posted: December 27th, 2009 | Category: General News | 1 Comment »
[The camera opens up inside the WMW Arena to a minimal capacity crowd if you could imagine one. The ring ropes have been removed and in the center of the ring is a make-shift talk show set where we see none other than the Bastard Icon, Eric Dillinger, sitting behind a black desk wearing his normal blue jeans rolled up over oxblood Gripfast boots and a black and yellow Fred Perry. His co-host Michael Albertson sits next to him on a long black leather couch wearing a WMW green and white polo, brown slacks, and penny loafers with a red glass coffee table in front of him. Sitting on top of the table is a small sign that reads "Nothing Nice to Say," and a coffee cup. Both men have mics clipped to their shirts and look to be in good spirits. Eric stands from behind the table and takes center stage.]
Eric Dillinger - Well, folks, I just want to take a moment to welcome y'all to the first and hopefully not the last edition of WMW's Nothing Nice to Say. The suits in the back were nice enough to pick up the show after the AWA closed it's doors.
Michael Albertson - Really we just kept on bugging them until they agreed.
Eric Dillinger - Damn straight. For everyone watching at home locally you should know that seating is limited at these tapings. If you want to attend a live show I accept cash and Mike takes sexual favors from men.
Michael Albertson - Sonova--
Eric Dillinger - But seriously, admission is paid for the day of the event and if you get turned away sorry.
Michael Albertson - But you can get a copy of This Bastard's Life if you cause a stir at the door.
Eric Dillinger - God damn it, don't tell them.
Michael Albertson - That's for the man love comment.
Eric Dillinger - I knew I should have hired Effler for this... Anyway, let's go ahead and bring out our first guest for the night. Most of you hate him--
Michael Albertson - --I'm pretty sure everybody hates him--
Eric Dillinger - He's done a lot in WMW and most recently held the Great Lakes Championship until he was dethroned by Kronin. AWS Man (also known as Bill), come on out!
["Three Point One Four" by the Bloodhound Gang plays as AWS Man (also known as Bill) makes his way down to the ring, wearing his trademark attire. He is also carrying Pen the Semi-Evil spatula, as usual. The Insane One steps into the ring, eyeing Dillinger suspiciously. Eric and Michael both extend their hands to shake, but AWS Man (also known as Bill) shakes his head no.]
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Sorry, I don’t shake hands. I’m not freakin’ germaphobic or anything, I just don’t like touching people … unless I’m slapping them around.
[Eric shrugs and takes his seat behind the desk as Michael scoots down on the couch to make room for AWS Man (also known as Bill) as a stage hand puts a coffee cup on the table for the Insane One.]
Eric Dillinger - Hey, welcome to the show, man.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - You’re welcome for me coming on, even though you were too freakin’ rude to say ‘thank you.’
[Eric looks at him for a moment before shrugging and moving on.]
Eric Dillinger - So tell me, where were you instead of being at Darwin's Revenge? Former GLC, you should have been on the card.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Hey, I’ve got other interests and things to be doing in my life than appear at every show. I’m not some freakin’ trained monkey that needs to answer at WMW’s beck and call. After all the years I’ve spent here, I deserve a PPV off now and then. Besides, I thought the other members of TDA! who were in action could get the job done without me, but obviously I was freakin’ wrong about that.
Eric Dillinger - Clearly with Valora and Pyre losing their tag match it would seem that TDA! is nothing with out it's leader.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - You know, that's pretty observant of you. Maybe I freakin' misjudged you, Bitch Legend. You're alright - not to be mistaken with all right.
[Eric pauses and looks at him again. There's an awkward stare between the two before Eric shakes his head and moves on.]
Eric Dillinger - Anyway, I've been watching WMW programming for awhile now and in the fatal fourway match between yourself, Adam Pyre, Hecate, and Valora we saw you turn on Pyre in hopes of getting the big win for yourself. It seriously could have been a major win for That Damn Awesome! in general, but I have to ask: why? Why did you do it?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - (Shrugs) I just did it to him before he could freakin’ do it to me, that’s all. That Valero’s a bad influence on him, and now he’s thinking he’s got to prove himself to her, maybe by trying to unseat me as leader of That Damn Awesome! Well, that wasn’t gonna freakin’ happen. I’m not happy that Hectate stole what should have been my pin on him, but in a way, it was better than Pyrite or Valium winning and trying to use that to say they should have my spot.
Eric Dillinger - I know we've just met and all, but it seems to me like That Damn Awesome! is all about you.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Again with the observeyness. Though, I wouldn't say it's all about me. Just the important parts.
Michael Albertson - Has Valora's entrance into TDA! been a good thing or a bad thing?
Eric Dillinger - Hey, I'm asking the questions! Valora, good or bad for TDA!?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - At first, it seemed like a great thing, but after her last two freakin’ losses, I’m not so sure. And like I said, she seems to be poisoning Pyre against me. If she doesn’t shape up soon, something might have to be done.
Michael Albertson - Care to go into detail about that?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Not really. Vagicil will freakin' find out what it means if and when the time comes.
Eric Dillinger - Anybody else that's just about to get, y'know, dealt with in WMW?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Well, there's Kronus, of course. You can't just try to rip off a man's face and freakin' steal his title without repercussions. His uppance will come, eventually.
Eric Dillinger - I want to change up the pace for a second here, if we could. Not much is really known about you in terms of your personal life. Is that why you wear the paintball mask so you can live two lives separately with out any chance of them ever messing with the other?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - That would imply I ever take the mask off. Let me ask you, do freakin' you ever shave off those freakin' mutton chop sideburns you're sporting? No, because it's your look, even if it is a stupid one.
Eric Dillinger - Well when I normally grow these chops it's like an indian putting on war paint. If you'd care to--
Michael Albertson - So there's no chance we're going to get to see who's under that mask any time soon?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Well, if I wasn't going to take it off to get laid by freakin' Panda Express, then what do you think the chances are of me taking it off for you?
Michael Albertson - Got my money on Jimmy Hoffa.
Eric Dillinger - I'm going with Eddie Munster.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - I'll freakin' take Tera Patrick.
Eric Dillinger - It's a GWAR reference, but whatever.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - I know what Gwalmart is. Don't patronize me.
Michael Albertson - Patronizing is the sincerest form of flattery.
Eric Dillinger - Not really.
Michael Albertson - But why a paint ball mask? That thing has got to hinder your sight somewhat.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - No, it's surprisingly accommodating. Plus it's stylish, and it freakin' offers great protection when getting punched or kicked in the face, which seems to happen quite often in our profession for some reason. I'm surprised it hasn't actually caught on more, but then again, any other wrestler wearing a freakin' paintball mask knows they would be copying me and would have to pay the price, so I guess that's why.
Eric Dillinger - Well, AWS Man... Bill... whatever... It's time to bring out our next guest. Unlike you the fans happen to love this guy.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - If the fans freakin’ love him so much, why don’t they sleep with him, get knocked up, then fall into depression and move into their parents’ house when he stops returning their calls because he’s an irresponsible hippie? Freakin’ huh?
Eric Dillinger - Funny you should say that because he's the guy who beat you for the GLC. Folks, welcome to the ring Kronin!
['Freya' by the Sword plays over the speakers and Kronin heads out, shredding away on his guitar to his own entrance. He's dressed in a WMW sweat shirt and wearing his trademark black leather trench over the shirt and black colored jeans combo he's wearing. He is also wearing his Great Lakes Championship belt and has his tag team belt draped over his shoulder. He acknowledges the cheers of the fans in the stands and finally makes his way over to Eric, setting his guitar aside and securing his titles. A stage hand sets down a coffee mug in front of him as well.]
Eric Dillinger - Welcome to the show.
Kronin - Hey, no prob, man. Thanks for inviting me to the shindig.
Eric Dillinger - So how's life been for the GLC?
Kronin - Rockin. Firstly, I'm the Great Lakes Champ, which makes life in Wrestling Midwest pretty awesome to start off with. Then, Ryven and I are just coming off a thrashing of AWS Man (Also Known as Former Champ)'s TDA buddies to retain the hold of the WMW Tag team titles. Now, 2010 looms before us and with our entry into the WWA, I'm looking to show just how dominant a competitor I can be and show just what the GLC has been missing before I got thrown into the mix.
Eric Dillinger - There's some talk that at Blizzard coming up in 2010, the first WMW show of the New Year, that the GLC will be involved in a very intense match up. What're your thoughts on this and is there anything you might know that we could tell the fans about?
Kronin - Well, I know it's going to be some sort of new take on a ladder match, but management was still ironing out the details last time I asked so I don't have much info that I can pass along right now.
Michael Albertson - Any word on who the contenders will be?
Kronin - Well, unless they promote people from another division, I assume it will be AWS Man and I again. Not many active members in the GLC division, especially with Jade jumping down to nab herself a Shoot title reign.
Eric Dillinger - Well, folks, I just want to take a moment to welcome y'all to the first and hopefully not the last edition of WMW's Nothing Nice to Say. The suits in the back were nice enough to pick up the show after the AWA closed it's doors.
Michael Albertson - Really we just kept on bugging them until they agreed.
Eric Dillinger - Damn straight. For everyone watching at home locally you should know that seating is limited at these tapings. If you want to attend a live show I accept cash and Mike takes sexual favors from men.
Michael Albertson - Sonova--
Eric Dillinger - But seriously, admission is paid for the day of the event and if you get turned away sorry.
Michael Albertson - But you can get a copy of This Bastard's Life if you cause a stir at the door.
Eric Dillinger - God damn it, don't tell them.
Michael Albertson - That's for the man love comment.
Eric Dillinger - I knew I should have hired Effler for this... Anyway, let's go ahead and bring out our first guest for the night. Most of you hate him--
Michael Albertson - --I'm pretty sure everybody hates him--
Eric Dillinger - He's done a lot in WMW and most recently held the Great Lakes Championship until he was dethroned by Kronin. AWS Man (also known as Bill), come on out!
["Three Point One Four" by the Bloodhound Gang plays as AWS Man (also known as Bill) makes his way down to the ring, wearing his trademark attire. He is also carrying Pen the Semi-Evil spatula, as usual. The Insane One steps into the ring, eyeing Dillinger suspiciously. Eric and Michael both extend their hands to shake, but AWS Man (also known as Bill) shakes his head no.]
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Sorry, I don’t shake hands. I’m not freakin’ germaphobic or anything, I just don’t like touching people … unless I’m slapping them around.
[Eric shrugs and takes his seat behind the desk as Michael scoots down on the couch to make room for AWS Man (also known as Bill) as a stage hand puts a coffee cup on the table for the Insane One.]
Eric Dillinger - Hey, welcome to the show, man.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - You’re welcome for me coming on, even though you were too freakin’ rude to say ‘thank you.’
[Eric looks at him for a moment before shrugging and moving on.]
Eric Dillinger - So tell me, where were you instead of being at Darwin's Revenge? Former GLC, you should have been on the card.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Hey, I’ve got other interests and things to be doing in my life than appear at every show. I’m not some freakin’ trained monkey that needs to answer at WMW’s beck and call. After all the years I’ve spent here, I deserve a PPV off now and then. Besides, I thought the other members of TDA! who were in action could get the job done without me, but obviously I was freakin’ wrong about that.
Eric Dillinger - Clearly with Valora and Pyre losing their tag match it would seem that TDA! is nothing with out it's leader.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - You know, that's pretty observant of you. Maybe I freakin' misjudged you, Bitch Legend. You're alright - not to be mistaken with all right.
[Eric pauses and looks at him again. There's an awkward stare between the two before Eric shakes his head and moves on.]
Eric Dillinger - Anyway, I've been watching WMW programming for awhile now and in the fatal fourway match between yourself, Adam Pyre, Hecate, and Valora we saw you turn on Pyre in hopes of getting the big win for yourself. It seriously could have been a major win for That Damn Awesome! in general, but I have to ask: why? Why did you do it?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - (Shrugs) I just did it to him before he could freakin’ do it to me, that’s all. That Valero’s a bad influence on him, and now he’s thinking he’s got to prove himself to her, maybe by trying to unseat me as leader of That Damn Awesome! Well, that wasn’t gonna freakin’ happen. I’m not happy that Hectate stole what should have been my pin on him, but in a way, it was better than Pyrite or Valium winning and trying to use that to say they should have my spot.
Eric Dillinger - I know we've just met and all, but it seems to me like That Damn Awesome! is all about you.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Again with the observeyness. Though, I wouldn't say it's all about me. Just the important parts.
Michael Albertson - Has Valora's entrance into TDA! been a good thing or a bad thing?
Eric Dillinger - Hey, I'm asking the questions! Valora, good or bad for TDA!?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - At first, it seemed like a great thing, but after her last two freakin’ losses, I’m not so sure. And like I said, she seems to be poisoning Pyre against me. If she doesn’t shape up soon, something might have to be done.
Michael Albertson - Care to go into detail about that?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Not really. Vagicil will freakin' find out what it means if and when the time comes.
Eric Dillinger - Anybody else that's just about to get, y'know, dealt with in WMW?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Well, there's Kronus, of course. You can't just try to rip off a man's face and freakin' steal his title without repercussions. His uppance will come, eventually.
Eric Dillinger - I want to change up the pace for a second here, if we could. Not much is really known about you in terms of your personal life. Is that why you wear the paintball mask so you can live two lives separately with out any chance of them ever messing with the other?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - That would imply I ever take the mask off. Let me ask you, do freakin' you ever shave off those freakin' mutton chop sideburns you're sporting? No, because it's your look, even if it is a stupid one.
Eric Dillinger - Well when I normally grow these chops it's like an indian putting on war paint. If you'd care to--
Michael Albertson - So there's no chance we're going to get to see who's under that mask any time soon?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Well, if I wasn't going to take it off to get laid by freakin' Panda Express, then what do you think the chances are of me taking it off for you?
Michael Albertson - Got my money on Jimmy Hoffa.
Eric Dillinger - I'm going with Eddie Munster.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - I'll freakin' take Tera Patrick.
Eric Dillinger - It's a GWAR reference, but whatever.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - I know what Gwalmart is. Don't patronize me.
Michael Albertson - Patronizing is the sincerest form of flattery.
Eric Dillinger - Not really.
Michael Albertson - But why a paint ball mask? That thing has got to hinder your sight somewhat.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - No, it's surprisingly accommodating. Plus it's stylish, and it freakin' offers great protection when getting punched or kicked in the face, which seems to happen quite often in our profession for some reason. I'm surprised it hasn't actually caught on more, but then again, any other wrestler wearing a freakin' paintball mask knows they would be copying me and would have to pay the price, so I guess that's why.
Eric Dillinger - Well, AWS Man... Bill... whatever... It's time to bring out our next guest. Unlike you the fans happen to love this guy.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - If the fans freakin’ love him so much, why don’t they sleep with him, get knocked up, then fall into depression and move into their parents’ house when he stops returning their calls because he’s an irresponsible hippie? Freakin’ huh?
Eric Dillinger - Funny you should say that because he's the guy who beat you for the GLC. Folks, welcome to the ring Kronin!
['Freya' by the Sword plays over the speakers and Kronin heads out, shredding away on his guitar to his own entrance. He's dressed in a WMW sweat shirt and wearing his trademark black leather trench over the shirt and black colored jeans combo he's wearing. He is also wearing his Great Lakes Championship belt and has his tag team belt draped over his shoulder. He acknowledges the cheers of the fans in the stands and finally makes his way over to Eric, setting his guitar aside and securing his titles. A stage hand sets down a coffee mug in front of him as well.]
Eric Dillinger - Welcome to the show.
Kronin - Hey, no prob, man. Thanks for inviting me to the shindig.
Eric Dillinger - So how's life been for the GLC?
Kronin - Rockin. Firstly, I'm the Great Lakes Champ, which makes life in Wrestling Midwest pretty awesome to start off with. Then, Ryven and I are just coming off a thrashing of AWS Man (Also Known as Former Champ)'s TDA buddies to retain the hold of the WMW Tag team titles. Now, 2010 looms before us and with our entry into the WWA, I'm looking to show just how dominant a competitor I can be and show just what the GLC has been missing before I got thrown into the mix.
Eric Dillinger - There's some talk that at Blizzard coming up in 2010, the first WMW show of the New Year, that the GLC will be involved in a very intense match up. What're your thoughts on this and is there anything you might know that we could tell the fans about?
Kronin - Well, I know it's going to be some sort of new take on a ladder match, but management was still ironing out the details last time I asked so I don't have much info that I can pass along right now.
Michael Albertson - Any word on who the contenders will be?
Kronin - Well, unless they promote people from another division, I assume it will be AWS Man and I again. Not many active members in the GLC division, especially with Jade jumping down to nab herself a Shoot title reign.
Eric Dillinger - Regardless of who's in this match I sure a certain some one would love to be in it. Isn't that right, William?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Screw whoever this freakin' William guy is you're talking to! I should be in this match before him!
[Eric chuckles to himself as Michael Albertson shakes his head at him from across the couch. Eric glances at his co-host and gleefully continues on.]
Eric Dillinger - So here we are. The leader of That Damn Awesome! and the Pinnacle of Power in the ring together.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Don't get too excited. Chronk's Disease isn't worth lifting a freakin' finger to beat down unless I'm getting paid extra to do it.
(Eric smiles again and looks Kronin in the eye.)
Eric Dillinger - Your thoughts?
Kronin - Translation: He knows I'll beat his ass again and wants to spare himself the beating.
Eric Dillinger - I have to give you guy’s credit where credit is due. You've been in the ring all but five minutes together and no one's started slapping the other around.
Kronin - Heh, I got nothing to prove to paintball boy here. Last time we had a match, he hit me with everything he had, including fire ants. No wait, I took his fire ants from him and used them on him. I have a video of that as my new screensaver. Hilarious, I tell you.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - And all those ants are dead now and their children are freakin' orphans, so I guess the joke's on them.
Eric Dillinger - Though, that doesn't rule out the future. Tell me, when do the fans get to see AWS Man (also known as Bill) VS Kronin II?
Kronin - Well, I'm sure it will happen sooner or later. But, I really want to change the game here. The Great Lakes Championship has been like some very exclusive, snobby country club and due to that there's almost no one in the damn division. So, AWS Man will get his rematch, but later on this year, I plan to start the 1st annual Rock and Shock GLC tournament. Anyone in the WMW who would like a shot at my Great Lakes Championship can enter and compete against each other. The winner of the tournament gets a match with me for the Great Lakes Championship. This belt is supposed to mean that I'm the best Wrestling Midwest has to offer and therefore I'm going to be a fighting champion and defend it against all comers.
Eric Dillinger - Kronin, I've also got to ask about the state of the Pinnacle of Power. Druscilla, Valora, and Jade have all left leaving just a few members. With TDA! basically consisting of Pyre, AWS Man (also Known as Bill), and a disgruntled Valora, is there really any reason for the PoP to exist any longer?
Kronin - Well… The PoP is reeling a bit, to be sure. I mean, losing Amariie, Druscilla, Valora and Jade hurts because they're all top notch competitors. Right now, effectively, the PoP is just Ryven and I so... it is very possible you will see the PoP disband, or maybe Ryven and I will do some recruiting, rebuild, and move forward. I have some ideas for a return of the PoP.
Eric Dillinger - How do you feel about those who have left your ranks, by the way?
Michael Albertson - Any hard feelings?
Kronin - Nah, I understand the reasons for the most part. Jade put a lot of time and energy into the Pinnacle of Power, sacrificed her own career to build something here and some of us dropped the ball and couldn't get past egos and such. Now, that being said, it's a hard sell to convince me that kicking me in the head and jumping me backstage was a good thing for me, so Jade and I are gonna have words about that at some point. Druscilla is.... well Druscilla is just not a good person. She does her thing and doesn't care about the fans here, which works out well cause the fans don't seem to care about her either, for the most part, save her fanbase that are either hyper goth or just masochists who love to hear themselves berated and insulted constantly... Valora, well Valora got screwed plain and simple. Adam Pyre had a great plan and eliminated one of the few people who would have come out to help Valora when he had Hecate drugged, he also got lucky when Jade jumped me, but hey, what do you expect from a man who tried to go all Saw on us and kill Jade with a gas trap? So far, I don't see where Valora has helped TDA! Before Valora or BV, if you will, TDA had one leader, AWS Man. Now, After Valora or AV, there's a slew of possibilities. Valora is far and away the most popular and dominant member of TDA at the moment. AWS Man is a former GLC though. Adam Pyre? Crafted a master plan to land his stable the biggest free agent signing of the year so, who should be leader? TDA is fighting about that right now; we saw that in the fatal four way match.
Eric Dillinger - What do you have to say, Will?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - I don't know who the freak this other guy you keep talking to is, but it's starting to piss me off. I'm your other freakin' guest here, ask me the questions... Although, I pretty much tuned out during that whole speech anyway, so I have nothing to comment on. But whatever Kroenke said, he's wrong and I'm awesome.
Eric Dillinger - Hillarious. You know, now that this great place we know as Wrestling Midwest is apart of WWA I'd like to see how you two fare in the World Title scene.
Michael Albertson - Yea, recently we saw the first shots of what's being called Civil War by everyone through out the wrestling community. There's been some dispute over the World Title between members of Appalachian Wrestling and the blossoming Defiance in the south and it erupted in Philadelphia, PA. How would the members of the GLC, or any division in WMW, fit into the World Title scene in WWA?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - I can't speak for anyone else here, because I'm so much better than them, but I would do fanfreakin'tastic. I'll admit I know nothing about those feds you mentioned, and "Civil War" sounds like a gibberish phrase to me, like "pro-life." But my ignorance has never slowed me freakin' down before. Put somebody in front of me, from any fed in the Wwwwah, and I'll give them the biggest freakin' beatdown in the history of big freakin' beatdowns. True story.
Kronin - Meh, I've been World Champ before. Just about every fed has a 'World Title' and most of them mean jack shit. The WWA, on the other hand, offers a World Title that you have beat the crap out of people from other feds for. Well, that's just fine with me. That belt will find it's way around my waist, sooner or later.
Eric Dillinger - And what if this kind of violence spills into the WMW Arena? What will happen then?
Kronin - I don't envy those poor schmucks. WMW has some of the best talent I've ever seen and enough sociopaths to officially classify itself as a mental hospital as well. So, anyone from other feds comes into our house and starts something, well WMW talent has put aside personal differences to unite under a WMW banner before when we showed Deathcore Championship Wrestling what was what. We'll do so again and any fool that comes into WMW looking for trouble will find it, right before they experience the fine medical care available in Cleveland.
Eric Dillinger - So basically that is a warning to all the other federations in the WWA. Stay out of our back yard and we won't go into yours and, basically, stomp the shit out of you?
Kronin - Pretty much, yeah.
Michael Albertson - That's all nice and dandy, but personally I would love to see the WMW solely go head to head with another place and come out on top. As a referee I saw many great factions go to war with each other--
Eric Dillinger - And sometimes you got caught in the cross fire.
Michael Albertson - Yea, that happened, too, but it's always great for business when you have that kind of stuff going on. Now, as a fan, it would just be totally cool to see. Especially for the fans of WMW here in Cleveland to see the home team win the big one.
[There's a positive reaction from the crowd in response to this.]
Eric Dillinger - Well, who knows what will happen as a part of the WWA. As for now that is all of our allotted time and I just wanna thank you two for showing up on the show and not destroying the set. I was expecting that with having a glass coffee table this show was going to get a little more interesting than it should have prematurely.
Michael Albertson - Hot coffee to the face would have been good, too.
Kronin - Umm not sure you noticed, Mike but... AWS Man wears a paintball mask. Hot coffee to the face would be a useless attack. Besides, like I said. I got nothing to prove to AWS Man at the moment. I'm the champ, and he's not. Simple as that.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - I'm above throwing coffee in another man's freakin' face. I prefer the classier technique of secretly peeing on his toothbrush while you're tagging together. Which I did to Krump, several times.
Eric Dillinger - Yea, well, before we go we got one last chance at controversy. The ever infamous Nothing Nice question that ends every interview. One person, dead or alive, you could punch in the face. Who would it be and why?
Kronin - Hmm, well I've got a few people who could end up with a nice dose of Rock and Shock. Vince McMahon, Hitler, they all come in close to the top, but I'd have to say... every fuckin' banker on Wall Street for fucking up the economy and having the gall to piss on us as they did it.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Besides the hippie sitting across from me, since I have already punched him in the face, many times ... George freakin' Washington. He thinks he's better than me just because he was the first President and chopped down a cherry tree to free the slaves and end prohibition? Well, he's freakin' not. A nice punch to the face should settle that.
Eric Dillinger - That's it folks. I'm the Bastard Icon, Eric Dillinger, that over there is my co-host, Michael Albertson, and this was Nothing Nice to Say. Thanks for coming out!
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Screw whoever this freakin' William guy is you're talking to! I should be in this match before him!
[Eric chuckles to himself as Michael Albertson shakes his head at him from across the couch. Eric glances at his co-host and gleefully continues on.]
Eric Dillinger - So here we are. The leader of That Damn Awesome! and the Pinnacle of Power in the ring together.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Don't get too excited. Chronk's Disease isn't worth lifting a freakin' finger to beat down unless I'm getting paid extra to do it.
(Eric smiles again and looks Kronin in the eye.)
Eric Dillinger - Your thoughts?
Kronin - Translation: He knows I'll beat his ass again and wants to spare himself the beating.
Eric Dillinger - I have to give you guy’s credit where credit is due. You've been in the ring all but five minutes together and no one's started slapping the other around.
Kronin - Heh, I got nothing to prove to paintball boy here. Last time we had a match, he hit me with everything he had, including fire ants. No wait, I took his fire ants from him and used them on him. I have a video of that as my new screensaver. Hilarious, I tell you.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - And all those ants are dead now and their children are freakin' orphans, so I guess the joke's on them.
Eric Dillinger - Though, that doesn't rule out the future. Tell me, when do the fans get to see AWS Man (also known as Bill) VS Kronin II?
Kronin - Well, I'm sure it will happen sooner or later. But, I really want to change the game here. The Great Lakes Championship has been like some very exclusive, snobby country club and due to that there's almost no one in the damn division. So, AWS Man will get his rematch, but later on this year, I plan to start the 1st annual Rock and Shock GLC tournament. Anyone in the WMW who would like a shot at my Great Lakes Championship can enter and compete against each other. The winner of the tournament gets a match with me for the Great Lakes Championship. This belt is supposed to mean that I'm the best Wrestling Midwest has to offer and therefore I'm going to be a fighting champion and defend it against all comers.
Eric Dillinger - Kronin, I've also got to ask about the state of the Pinnacle of Power. Druscilla, Valora, and Jade have all left leaving just a few members. With TDA! basically consisting of Pyre, AWS Man (also Known as Bill), and a disgruntled Valora, is there really any reason for the PoP to exist any longer?
Kronin - Well… The PoP is reeling a bit, to be sure. I mean, losing Amariie, Druscilla, Valora and Jade hurts because they're all top notch competitors. Right now, effectively, the PoP is just Ryven and I so... it is very possible you will see the PoP disband, or maybe Ryven and I will do some recruiting, rebuild, and move forward. I have some ideas for a return of the PoP.
Eric Dillinger - How do you feel about those who have left your ranks, by the way?
Michael Albertson - Any hard feelings?
Kronin - Nah, I understand the reasons for the most part. Jade put a lot of time and energy into the Pinnacle of Power, sacrificed her own career to build something here and some of us dropped the ball and couldn't get past egos and such. Now, that being said, it's a hard sell to convince me that kicking me in the head and jumping me backstage was a good thing for me, so Jade and I are gonna have words about that at some point. Druscilla is.... well Druscilla is just not a good person. She does her thing and doesn't care about the fans here, which works out well cause the fans don't seem to care about her either, for the most part, save her fanbase that are either hyper goth or just masochists who love to hear themselves berated and insulted constantly... Valora, well Valora got screwed plain and simple. Adam Pyre had a great plan and eliminated one of the few people who would have come out to help Valora when he had Hecate drugged, he also got lucky when Jade jumped me, but hey, what do you expect from a man who tried to go all Saw on us and kill Jade with a gas trap? So far, I don't see where Valora has helped TDA! Before Valora or BV, if you will, TDA had one leader, AWS Man. Now, After Valora or AV, there's a slew of possibilities. Valora is far and away the most popular and dominant member of TDA at the moment. AWS Man is a former GLC though. Adam Pyre? Crafted a master plan to land his stable the biggest free agent signing of the year so, who should be leader? TDA is fighting about that right now; we saw that in the fatal four way match.
Eric Dillinger - What do you have to say, Will?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - I don't know who the freak this other guy you keep talking to is, but it's starting to piss me off. I'm your other freakin' guest here, ask me the questions... Although, I pretty much tuned out during that whole speech anyway, so I have nothing to comment on. But whatever Kroenke said, he's wrong and I'm awesome.
Eric Dillinger - Hillarious. You know, now that this great place we know as Wrestling Midwest is apart of WWA I'd like to see how you two fare in the World Title scene.
Michael Albertson - Yea, recently we saw the first shots of what's being called Civil War by everyone through out the wrestling community. There's been some dispute over the World Title between members of Appalachian Wrestling and the blossoming Defiance in the south and it erupted in Philadelphia, PA. How would the members of the GLC, or any division in WMW, fit into the World Title scene in WWA?
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - I can't speak for anyone else here, because I'm so much better than them, but I would do fanfreakin'tastic. I'll admit I know nothing about those feds you mentioned, and "Civil War" sounds like a gibberish phrase to me, like "pro-life." But my ignorance has never slowed me freakin' down before. Put somebody in front of me, from any fed in the Wwwwah, and I'll give them the biggest freakin' beatdown in the history of big freakin' beatdowns. True story.
Kronin - Meh, I've been World Champ before. Just about every fed has a 'World Title' and most of them mean jack shit. The WWA, on the other hand, offers a World Title that you have beat the crap out of people from other feds for. Well, that's just fine with me. That belt will find it's way around my waist, sooner or later.
Eric Dillinger - And what if this kind of violence spills into the WMW Arena? What will happen then?
Kronin - I don't envy those poor schmucks. WMW has some of the best talent I've ever seen and enough sociopaths to officially classify itself as a mental hospital as well. So, anyone from other feds comes into our house and starts something, well WMW talent has put aside personal differences to unite under a WMW banner before when we showed Deathcore Championship Wrestling what was what. We'll do so again and any fool that comes into WMW looking for trouble will find it, right before they experience the fine medical care available in Cleveland.
Eric Dillinger - So basically that is a warning to all the other federations in the WWA. Stay out of our back yard and we won't go into yours and, basically, stomp the shit out of you?
Kronin - Pretty much, yeah.
Michael Albertson - That's all nice and dandy, but personally I would love to see the WMW solely go head to head with another place and come out on top. As a referee I saw many great factions go to war with each other--
Eric Dillinger - And sometimes you got caught in the cross fire.
Michael Albertson - Yea, that happened, too, but it's always great for business when you have that kind of stuff going on. Now, as a fan, it would just be totally cool to see. Especially for the fans of WMW here in Cleveland to see the home team win the big one.
[There's a positive reaction from the crowd in response to this.]
Eric Dillinger - Well, who knows what will happen as a part of the WWA. As for now that is all of our allotted time and I just wanna thank you two for showing up on the show and not destroying the set. I was expecting that with having a glass coffee table this show was going to get a little more interesting than it should have prematurely.
Michael Albertson - Hot coffee to the face would have been good, too.
Kronin - Umm not sure you noticed, Mike but... AWS Man wears a paintball mask. Hot coffee to the face would be a useless attack. Besides, like I said. I got nothing to prove to AWS Man at the moment. I'm the champ, and he's not. Simple as that.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - I'm above throwing coffee in another man's freakin' face. I prefer the classier technique of secretly peeing on his toothbrush while you're tagging together. Which I did to Krump, several times.
Eric Dillinger - Yea, well, before we go we got one last chance at controversy. The ever infamous Nothing Nice question that ends every interview. One person, dead or alive, you could punch in the face. Who would it be and why?
Kronin - Hmm, well I've got a few people who could end up with a nice dose of Rock and Shock. Vince McMahon, Hitler, they all come in close to the top, but I'd have to say... every fuckin' banker on Wall Street for fucking up the economy and having the gall to piss on us as they did it.
AWS Man (also known as Bill) - Besides the hippie sitting across from me, since I have already punched him in the face, many times ... George freakin' Washington. He thinks he's better than me just because he was the first President and chopped down a cherry tree to free the slaves and end prohibition? Well, he's freakin' not. A nice punch to the face should settle that.
Eric Dillinger - That's it folks. I'm the Bastard Icon, Eric Dillinger, that over there is my co-host, Michael Albertson, and this was Nothing Nice to Say. Thanks for coming out!
[The scene fades.]
Nothing Nice to Say, Webisode Ep. 1 digg_bgcolor = '#ffffff'; digg_skin = 'compact'; Posted January 1st by EW Torch Staff in E-Wrestling News, Torchcenter, Wrestling Midwest Source: Wrestling Midwest