Graveyard Shift 126

[The shot opens up showing the WMW and Graveyard Shift logos in the WMW Arena as big bursts of pyro go off in the background and the crowd in attendance cheers loudly. The camera pans to show Jack Gene and Bill Hughes, dressed up in their best commentating attire.]

[Matrix paces around the ring and points to the fans.]

Matrix - You know, I owe you an apology... I used to think it was you brainwashing and leading these sycophants astray but now I see that it's YOU who are the victim here!

[Father Nathan looks confused as anyone does.]

Jack Gene - What the hell is Matrix talking about?

Bill Hughes - Wait... let's see where he's going with this...

Matrix - You've been misled, Nathan.  And yes, I say Nathan... you know... I saw the approaches that Eric Dillinger and Jordan Keyser took to reach you, and it worked.  We've seen the real Nathan... You've proven that you don't need these people!  You don't need them, Nathan!  More then that... I think the one that's been brainwashed is YOU!  What has your false God done for you, man?  Made you stand there helpless as your wife and kids were killed?  Forced you to suck up to and tend to these moronic simpletons, who would turn on you in a second!  See... you know the truth about these people, Nathan?  Do ya wanna know what it is?

[Nathan clenches his fist and takes a step towards Matrix, ready to nail him, but Matrix holds up a hand.]

Matrix - These people are jealous, Nathan.  People like you and me... we're Gods among men... But they can't hate that.  Think about it man, it's human nature they see someone better then them... they gotta make an excuse for it.  In your case, they got you to believe that you're just some guy... and that God is channeling this awesome fighting and ass kicking ability through you.  But we both know that's just bull[bleep], isn't it Nathan... so I'm here to change my goals and I'm going to save you... from these idiots...

[The crowd boos as Nathan chants break out and Nathan looks around and thinks for a moment... looking to his cross at ringside and then to Matrix.]

Father Nathan - You listen to me, and you listen good, you son of a bitch... You're right about one thing... there is a fraud here... but it isn't me... it isn't these fans...

[Father Nathan paces around the ring and points at Matrix.]

Father Nathan - It's you! 

[The crowd roars and Matrix sighs, making a move to respond but Nathan cuts him off.]

Father Nathan - You got your match at Hardcore Hell.  You got another shot at my Ace Superior Championship.. but spare me the mind games, and the B.S. because, you really don't have the talent for it and so help me GOD, I'll make you pay the full Price of Sin!!!

[The crowd roars as Matrix nods and paces around.]

[As he says the last line, Matrix sucker punches Nathan with the hand he holds the mic in, sending Nathan to the mat.  Matrix stomps on Nathan but Nathan fights his way to his feet and the two just stand there trading punches until WMW security comes in to pull them apart. It seems like they are done until Trix breaks free of the security and once again catches Nathan by surprise, clotheslining him to the ground. Matrix rolls out of the ring as Nathan is helped up.]

[The shot opens up to the WMW Arena. "What It's Like" by Everlast begins to play over the loud speaker, causing the crowd to break into a mixed reaction. The Emo Girl walks out with one hand up in the air, playing off of the crowd. She slaps hands with the audience as she walks down the aisle, wearing a black tank top and athletic shorts.]

Wayne Inkster - The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is for the #1 Contendership to the Heartlands Championship! On her way to the ring...Rebecca "The Emo Girl" Randolph!

Jack Gene - Here comes the newest sensation in the Heartlands division, The Emo Girl! And as usual, she's looking very stunning tonight.

Bill Hughes - As stunning as a melting pack of ice.

Jack Gene - What does that even mean?

[The Emo Girl rolls into the ring and stands up, perky and ready. The generic Graveyard Shift plays next as Jordan Keyser comes out a slew of boo's from the crowd.]

Wayne Inkster - Coming to the ring next, Jordan "The Executioner" Keyser!

Jack Gene - And here comes the man himself, Jordan Keyser, looking to make a huge leap to the Heartlands championship with a win here tonight.

[The song played next is "Breathe" by Fabulous, and as the body of the rap starts, the curtains part and in walks Xavier Langston, a sole white spotlight focused on him as the lights dim slightly. Xavier is wearing a sleeveless black trench coat, black wrestling tights, and a pair of black wrestling boots. His appearance prompts a mixed reaction from the crowd: some are politely applauding the newcomer, giving him a shot, while others are booing him for his ties with the now-defunct World Wrestling Alliance.]

Wayne Inkster - The third of four contenders, on his way to the ring...Xavier Langston!

[Xavier walks down the aisle, keeping a smile on his face. Fans who have their hands outstretched looking for a high five receive it. Fans with their fingers outstretched are ignored. He rolls into the ring, glancing at Jordan who is near him, and Emo Girl across the ring.]

Bill Hughes - In all seriousness, this match does have some serious potential, with the four biggest names in the Heartlands division.

[The lights go out as "Everybody's Fool" by Evanescence plays over the sound system. A spotlight appears as Amariie Maerthos rises up from the stage and follows her as she walks to the ring and slids in before the lights return.]

Wayne Inkster - And finally, on her way to the ring, it's Amariie Maerthos!

Jack Gene - Possibly the woman with the biggest advantage here, having already been on the top of this division and wants that re-match with Gras-Dawg.

Bill Hughes - Yea, well, she's got three hungry people to go through first.

[Referee Tyson Banes calls for the bell and the four contenders all become comfortable with their corner. The crowd seems to be behind The Emo Girl, starting an 'Emo!' chant. Xavier is the one who starts things off, bouncing off the ropes and starting things off fast with a dropkick to Emo Girl, causing her to drop back into the turnbuckle. Amariie is about to go after Jordan Keyser, but the Executioner quickly rolls out under the bottoms ropes and backs away from the ring. Amariie shakes her head and turns to get between Xavier and Rebecca, interrupting Xavier's shoulder-tackle by laying some quickly shots on his forehead.]

Jack Gene - Oh come on, Jordan Keyser gets out of the way and is just watching from ringside. What is this, a triangle match? What a coward.

Bill Hughes - You say coward, I say the guy who's gonna pick apart his opponents at their most vulnerable and get the pinfall. Winning is winning, Jack, you should know that by now.

[Keyser watches the action from ringside as Amariie launches Langston to the ropes. He jumps into a spinning back kick upon return and knocks her to the ground. Upon getting up, he's grappled from behind by The Emo Girl and pushed into a turnbuckle, but he jumps up off of the turnbuckle, and runs along the top rope into a bulldog. As the crowd starts to light up and cheer for his momentum, Amariie charges him again, but he ducks, and catches her with a spinning back fist as she bounces off the ropes. She falls back into the turnbuckle he just lept from, and Xavier points at Jordan to direct him into the ring.]

Jack Gene - Xavier Langston is cleaning up house and yelling at Jordan Keyser to get in the ring! What an explosive start for this Defiance veteran!

Bill Hughes - He's smart to confront Keyser directly, because otherwise there's always going to be that shadow behind him.

[Jordan Keyser waves Xavier off and doesn't seem to be particularly bothered by the challenge. Xavier Langston turns around to deal with his other two opponents, and is welcomes back by a double kick from both The Emo Girl and Amariie Maerthos. // Flash Forward // Amariie is currently in charge, as Xavier is recovering in the corner of the ring, and Amariie is picking The Emo Girl up from the mat. She scoops her from behind and hits a German Suplex.]

Jack Gene - Amariie is now in firm control of this match, and Jordan Keyser has yet to see action.

Bill Hughes - He's just biding his time, that's all. Oh, and here it is!

[Jordan suddenly slides into the ring and sneak-attacks Amariie from behind. Xavier Langston tries to get advantage of the fresh Executioner, but Jordan ducks his attempt a flying back kick, and kicks him in the gut. Keyser then locks in the Lethal Injection and slams Xavier face-first into the mat. The crowd is booing wildly at the cheap performance as he goes for the pin. Tyson Banes counts it: 1...2...but a kick out, and then a low dropkick by Emo Girl causes Jordan to roll out again.]

Jack Gene - Oh, come on, is he gonna run and hide again?

[The Emo Girl leaps over the top rope and hits a surprisingly agile flying splash on Jordan Keyser, laying both of them out in the ringside area. This leaves Amariie and Xavier Langston in the ring, alone. Xavier tries to recover, but Amariie hits a knee strike and lays him back out. She goes a hand-less cartwheel into an elbow drop, causing the crowd to go wild.]

Bill Hughes - Amariie has complete control and she's about to get the pin!

[Amariie does go for the pin, but The Emo Girl reaches in from ringside and pulls her off of Xavier at 2.]

Jack Gene - It's going to be hard to get a pin with three other people hungry for that win!

[Flash Forward // Jordan Keyser has joined the fray in the ring, and has Amariie in the corner, wailing on her with rights and lefts to her forehead. Xavier Langston has control of The Emo Girl, hitting her with forearms as she struggles on her knees. He lifts her up and then hits a body slam, with plans to go to the top rope. But when he gets up to the turnbuckle, Jordan Keyser as hit a leg drop on Rebecca and gone for the pin. Xavier leaps off the corner and goes for a flying splash on both opponents, but Jordan rolls out of the way and Emo Girl is hit with the splash.]

Bill Hughes - Whoa! Huge splash misses Keyser! Emo Girl is out like a light!

Jack Gene - It's now a contest for who gets to pin her!

[Amariie Maerthos goes for an Axe Kick out of no where on Keyser, but he ducks it. As she spins back around, he catches her with the Perfect Execution.]

Jack Gene - My god! Perfect execution by Keyser!

[Keyser jumps up and yells down at Amariie.]

Bill Hughes - He forgot about Xavier!

Jack Gene - Xavier measures him up, OH! An Act of Defiance! That shining wizard kicks sends Keyser down and out to the floor. My god!

Bill Hughes - If I could trade places with someone, this would be one of those times. Amariie knocked out. Emo Girl knocked out. Well, then again, if Emo Girl would trade places with someone else. Someone who's hot.

[Xavier pushes Amariie out of the ring as Emo Girl starts to pull herself up. She holds her midsection in pain. Just as she turns to face him, Xavier shoots through the air.]

Jack Gene - And Xavier is going for... OH! The First Rule! Langston hit it! And here's the cover! The pin! ...1! ...2! ...3!

["Breathe" by Fabolous blasts through the air as Langston's hand is raised by the ref.]

Wayne Inkster - Here is your winner and the #1 Contender for the Heartlands Championship... Xavier... Langston!

Jack Gene - My god! Xavier Langston is going to Hardcore Hell to face Gras-Dawg!

[Xavier slides out of the ring. He looks around as Amariie and Jordan Keyser are still out on the outside. The scene fades.]

Writer: MOD

[The shot opens up in the ring.]

Bill Hughes - It is now time for the # 1 Contenders Match for the Shoot Championship.

["Unstoppable" by Rascal Flatts hits the PA system and a three-leaf clover appears on the big screen. Jasmine Lucky appears on the ramp with one arm up, trying to cheer the fans on. They give a mixed reaction, some loving her and most hating her.]

Wayne Inkster - Currently making her way to the ring, hailing from Las Vegas, Nevada, here is Jasmine Lucky.

["Bulls on Parade" by Rage Against the Machine blasts from the PA as Umbrage walks down to the ring.]

Wayne Inkster - Currently making his way down to the ring, hailing from Detroit, MI, here is Umbrage.

Bill Hughes - Referee Luna Pier calls for the bell and this match is under way. Umbrage and Jasmine Lucky begin to exchange punches. Umbrage gets the best of Jasmine Lucky and continues to punch away on Jasmine. Out of no where Jasmine Lucky goes low and connects with a low drop kick to the shin of Umbrage. This takes Umbrage goes down to one knee. Jasmine goes to the ropes and rebounds off. Jasmine goes for a clothesline, but Umbrage catches Jasmine and connects with a Side Effect.

[Flash Forward // Umbrage has a Full Nelson submission locked in. Jasmine Lucky is fighting it. Jasmine is trying to fight her way completely out of the submission move, but before she could Umbrage connects with a Full Nelson Slam.] 

Jack Gene - Umbrage goes for a pinfall. Luna Pier goes for the pinfall. Moments later Jasmine Lucky pops out at two.

[Flash Forward // Umbrage brings Jasmine Lucky to her feet. Umbrage with a kick to the midsection. Moments later Umbrage drills Jasmine Lucky into the mat with a powerbomb.]

Bill Hughes - Bridge now goes to the ropes and rebounds off the ropes. Umbrage goes for a leg drop, but Jasmine moves out of the way.

[Flash Forward // Jasmine connects with the Shining Wizard and goes for the pinfall. Luna Pier gets into position, but she can only get a two count.]

Jack Gene - Jasmine now brings Umbrage back to his feet.Jasmine Lucky connects with a series of kicks and out of no where connects with the Lucky Shot Super Kick. Jasmine Lucky goes for the pinfall. Moments later Bridge is able to pop out at two and a half.

[Flash Forward // Bridge back in control and slams Jasmine down to the mat. Umbrage follows it up with a leg drop. Umbrage brings Jasmine Lucky back to her feet, but out of no where Jasmine racks the eyes of Bridge. Jasmine begins to whip Umbrage to the ropes, but Bridge reverses the irish whip and sends Jasmine to the ropes instead. Umbrage signals for The Riot Act, but Lucky holds on to the ropes before she rebounds off. Jasmine Lucky catches Umbrage off guard and goes for the Lucky Shot Super Kick, but Umbrage counters the super kick attempt. Umbrage catches Jasmine in a Fireman's Carry and turns it into a sit-down piledriver.]

Bill Hughes - Umbrage just caught Jasmine Lucky with that Detroit Breakdown

Jack Gene - Bridge goes for the pinfall. Luna Pier gets into position. ...1! ...2! ...3!

Wayne Inkster - Here is your winner by pinfall, Umbrage.

Bill Hughes - Umbrage wins it. What a big victory for Umbrage here tonight.

Jack Gene - He is now the #1 contender for the Shoot Championship.

[The scene fades.]

Jack Gene – And that just about brings us to our main event, another match in the MTL4 tournament. It'll be the team of AWS Man (also known as Bill) and Josh Briskout taking on Father Nathan and the Black Friar.

Bill Hughes – Or more accurately, the Flying Sharktopi vs. the Inquisition.

Jack Gene – Also correct. Let's take it to Wayne for the introductions.

[Wayne Inkster is in the ring with a microphone.]

Wayne Inkster – Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is part of the Midwest Tag League 4 tournament, and is tonight's main event! Introducing first … fighting from Cleveland, Ohio and San Sebastian, Spain … at a combined weight of 460 pounds … made up of Father Nathan and Black Friar, they are the INQUISITION!!!

[Suddenly, the lights in the arena dim and the voice of the Black Friar can be heard over the PA: "Now begins the time of the Inquisition. Repent of your sins, that you might be forgiven. Heretics and blasphemers, prepare for thy Judgment."

Shortly after that, a Church bell tolls three times and over the PA, a group of Gregorian monks can be heard reciting the Latin poem 'Dies Irae'. Father Nathan emerges from the back, walking side by side with the Black Friar, both men also adding their voices to those on the PA. They make their way down to ringside, where Nathan sets his cross down and both men then climb into the ring, conversing with each other before the match.]

Jack Gene – The Inquisition are 0-1 thus far in the open season portion of the tournament, after their loss to Umbrage and Scott Vyper at GS124.

Bill Hughes – I don't think they'll fare much better tonight. Briskout's on a winning streak, which has him ranked #1 on WMW.com, and AWS Man's still hopping mad over losing the GLC last week, so you know he's got something to prove.

Jack Gene – You don't think the fact this is their first time teaming will hurt their chances?

Bill Hughes – Hey, Nathan and Friar have only had one match together themselves, and like you just said, that was a loss. I don't think that makes them a seasoned team.

Jack Gene – Fair enough, though AWS Man and Briskout were hardly on the same page last week…

Wayne Inkster – And their opponents … currently from Atlanta, Georgia and "Freakville," North Carolina … also at a combined weight of 460 pounds … they are AWS Man (also known as Bill) and Josh Briskout, the FLYING SHARKTOPI!!!

["Sympathy for the Devil" by the Rolling Stones begins to play as Josh Briskout walks out, with his trademark brown robe and fedora on. The crowd responds by booing the man known as Dr. Genocide. The crowd's boos get louder as AWS Man (also known as Bill) then walks out, followed by Lilly holding Pen on his gilded pillow. The Insane One looks none too pleased as he power walks down the ramp, impatiently motioning for Lilly to follow him. Briskout follows as well, chewing his cigar.]

Jack Gene – You're definitely right about AWS Man still seeming mad over losing his title last week. He just kicked Briskout's nephew Arn Ambrose in the face backstage with very little provocation, and now he seems to be taking his frustrations out on Lilly.

Bill Hughes – Well, of course he's going to take them out on her! She's the one who cost him the title in the first place! If she hadn't alerted John Law to the fact that Briskout handed Pen to AWS Man, then he'd very well still have his belt. Even if Law had noticed the spatula after AWS Man hit Druscilla with it, that would've been a DQ and AWS Man would have still retained the title.

Jack Gene – Maybe that's what Lilly was trying to accomplish. Did you ever think about that?

Bill Hughes – No, I didn't, because she's horrible. Seriously, aside from being pretty hot in that Leia bikini, she's completely useless.

[AWS Man (also known as Bill) sets a chair up at ringside and angrily motions for Lilly to sit down in it, after which he yells, "And don't freakin' move or say anything!" The Insane One then slides into the ring, as Briskout slides in as well and climbs up a turnbuckle post. He takes off his fedora and robe and tosses them down to land on Lilly's lap before doing a backflip to the mat.]

Jack Gene – And Briskout uses Lilly as a coatrack now. But at least AWS Man's allowing her to sit down this week. How magnanimous of him.

Bill Hughes – It's more than she deserves, the traitor…

[As Wayne Inkster is exiting the ring, AWS Man (also known as Bill) taps him on the shoulder and says something to him. Inkster looks at the Insane One questioning, but as the five-time GLC persists about something, Inkster sighs and walks back towards the center of the ring to raise his microphone again.]

Wayne Inkster - AWS Man (also known as Bill) would like me to inform all of you that his team also goes by the name of the Ninja Popes. And he hereby reserves the right to keep on adding more team names the longer they team, all of which I will apparently have to announce.

[Inkster exits the ring while shooting the Insane One a dirty look, which goes unnoticed by AWS Man (also known as Bill). The Insane One then walks past Briskout, not even consulting with his partner before climbing out onto the apron and pointing at Briskout to remain in. Dr. Genocide simply shrugs and approaches the center of the ring. On the other side, both priests quickly confer and nod before Black Friar exits the ring and Father Nathan moves towards Briskout. John Law has a quick word with both men before signaling for the bell.]

Jack Gene – Briskout and Nathan to start. Even though these teams are evenly matched in overall size, both weighing in at exactly 460 combined pounds, Nathan is definitely the biggest man in, weighing 250 pounds to Briskout's 224.

Bill Hughes – That's just too weird a coincidence. Think it's some sort of sign?

Jack Gene – A sign of what?

Bill Hughes – Uh, the apocalypse, I guess. Is there any other kind?

[Both men engage in a lockup, and Nathan quickly shoves Briskout to the mat. Josh rolls back up to his feet, but is immediately run over by a clothesline from Nathan. Briskout gets up once more, a little more hesitantly this time, and ducks a second clothesline attempt from Nathan. Briskout charges Nathan for a clothesline of his own as the priest turns around, but Nathan catches him with a powerslam and jumps back to his feet, yelling at the crowd to get them pumped up.]

Jack Gene – Nathan is pretty fired up tonight. He may be a man of God, but he holds nothing but contempt for his opponents and their sacrilegious ways, particularly AWS Man (also known as Bill).

Bill Hughes – Catholics are always so stuck up. I like Briskout's outlook, where you can be religious and even apparently hold a doctorate in theology, but still call yourself Dr. Genocide and callously kill people.

Jack Gene – I don't think you'll find too many priests who agree with you on that.

[After the powerslam, Briskout rolls under the ropes onto the apron, but doesn't drop to the floor. He uses the ropes to help himself get up as Father Nathan walks over to intercept him. Nathan pulls Briskout to his feet by the hair and prepares to sling him over the ropes back inside, but Briskout breaks free of his grasp with an eye rake, then grabs the top of Nathan's head and drops down to the floor to bounce Nathan's neck off of the top rope. He then reaches in and grabs Nathan by the legs, yanking him out hard so that Nathan falls to the floor roughly, landing on the back of his head.]

Bill Hughes – And that's why you never take your eye off Briskout. His mistake last week aside, he's a pretty smart tactician. He's not a doctor for nothing, after all.

Jack Gene – I thought you just said his doctorate was in theology.

Bill Hughes – Oh, so now you're saying religious scholars aren't smart? Wow, Jack. Way to offend basically every Christian ever.

Jack Gene – That's not at all what I… Never mind. I'm not having this argument with you.

[Briskout pulls Nathan up to his feet and leads him over towards the ring steps, then gives him a hard shove from behind, slamming Nathan's knees into the steps and causing him to flip over them. The impact also dislodges the top half of the steps, causing them to tumble over as well and end up lying on Nathan's legs. Briskout begins delivering stomps to the top of the steps, causing Nathan to cry out in pain as the steps are driven repeatedly into his knees. Law yells at Briskout from the ring to stop, and Briskout slides in, beginning to argue with Law that it wasn't illegal since he never picked up a foreign object to hit Nathan with.]

Bill Hughes – Look at Briskout, finding a loophole in the system. Attaboy!

Jack Gene – Except senior referee John Law isn't stupid, and he's not buying it. Technicalities aside, Briskout was still using the steps to hurt Nathan.

Bill Hughes – You say potato, I say tomato.

Jack Gene – What?

[While Law is busy arguing with Briskout, AWS Man (also known as Bill) runs down the apron to stand in front of where Nathan is gingerly getting to his feet. The Insane One glances over his shoulder to measure Nathan, then springs off the middle rope with an Asai moonsault, grabbing the good Father's head on the way down to drive it into the hard floor with a reverse DDT.]

Jack Gene – And great, now AWS Man is attacking Nathan behind Law's back!

Bill Hughes – What? Last time I checked, AWS Man is part of this match too.

Jack Gene – Not legally at this moment, he's not! His team, whatever the hell they want to be called at the moment, has wasted no time in bending the rules. Obviously they've learned nothing from last week.

Bill Hughes – Or maybe they've learned a lot, considering they're not getting caught this time.

[AWS Man (also known as Bill) picks Nathan up now and rolls him into the ring, as Briskout finally raises his hands and agrees not to use the steps anymore. He then walks over to Nathan and begins alternating kicks between the priest's head and legs, attacking both parts of the body that have already been damaged thus far.]

Jack Gene – Briskout, really targeting Nathan's head and legs here, particularly his right leg. He now lifts Nathan's leg up and performs a forward flip over Nathan's body, snapping the leg at an angle it shouldn't be extended to!

Bill Hughes – Well, if Nathan and Friar are to be believed, shouldn't God fix that leg right up in a jiffy? What's taking Him so long?

Jack Gene – Oh, they never said anything like that.

Bill Hughes – It's called reading between the lines, Jack.

[Nathan limps up to his feet at Briskout hovers just out of his striking range and eggs him on. Nathan lashes out with a kick with his good leg, but Briskout catches it and taunts Nathan as he tries to maintain his balance on his worked over right leg. As Briskout jeers in Nathan's face, the Irishman suddenly lashes out with a left jab, followed by a right cross. Briskout drops the leg and tries to cover up as he gets pummeled with Nathan's "Fightin' Irish" boxing combo.]

Jack Gene – Briskout was so busy disabling Nathan's legs, he forgot about his fists! And with Nathan's fighting background, that's not something you want to do.

[Briskout staggers back up after getting knocked to the mat, and gets scooped up onto Nathan's shoulders in a fireman's carry. Nathan wobbles under the weight for a moment, but turns it into a forward Samoan roll.]

Jack Gene – I thought Nathan might be going for his Price of Sin finisher early there, but instead he went with a forward Samoan roll which I imagine is easier to execute, especially if your legs have taken some abuse.

Bill Hughes – But "easy" won't get the job done in this match.

[Nathan picks Briskout up and grabs him in a front facelock for a DDT, but Briskout slips out of it and drops down low to take out Nathan's leg with a chop block. Nathan collapses to the mat holding the leg, and Briskout grabs it and ties the leg up before dropping to the mat and rolling over to place Nathan in a painful submission hold.]

Jack Gene – Wow, Briskout shows his technical side by busting out a reverse Indian deathlock. When's the last time you saw one of those?

Bill Hughes – I don't think I have. In fact, I'm pretty sure Briskout just made it up on the spot. He's a genius!

Jack Gene – Bill, your ignorance of our sport is frankly staggering at times.

Bill Hughes – Yeah, but I make it up with moxie.

[Briskout tries to stand, applying even more pressure to the leg. Nathan cries out and tries to crawl away towards his corner, but Briskout reaches forward for the nearest rope to steady himself. Before Law sees what he's doing, AWS Man (also known as Bill) tries to enter the ring, causing Law to run over and prevent him. This allows Briskout to grab the top rope and lean back as far as he can to exert maximum pressure.]

Jack Gene – Oh come on, this is ridiculous! Josh Briskout is cheating right behind the referee's back!

Bill Hughes – Better than in front of his face, right?

[With Law distracted by AWS Man (also known as Bill), he completely misses Black Friar leaping to the top rope and flying off to nail Briskout in the side of the face with a missile dropkick, flooring Dr. Genocide and drawing a big pop from the crowd. Friar then rolls back out of the ring while the Insane One frantically points behind Law and tries to tell him what just happened. But Law won't listen until the Insane One gets fully back on the apron. Meanwhile, Nathan slowly crawls towards his corner, while Briskout stumbles up and staggers towards his.]

Jack Gene – Ha! Once again, AWS Man's cheating tactics backfire on him. If he hadn't been distracting John Law, Friar couldn't have gotten away with it.

Bill Hughes – So what you're saying is it's OK when the priests cheat, because they're above the law, but not "unredeemable" average Joes like AWS Man and Briskout? Man, religion sure makes people hypocritical.

[Both Nathan and Briskout lunge to make their tags at about the same time. AWS Man (also known as Bill) steps into the ring as Friar vaults the top rope and runs forward, rolling underneath the Insane One's clothesline attempt and catches him with a dropkick to the back of the head.]

Jack Gene – Black Friar is by far the quickest competitor in this match, much moreso than even AWS Man, who's known for his speed and wiliness himself. But he's also deceptively strong. This should be a good match-up.

Bill Hughes – Jack, who are you trying to kid? Friar got the first shot in, but we all know AWS Man will make short work of this relative newbie.

[As AWS Man (also known as Bill) gets back up, Friar whips him into the ropes and leapfrogs the Insane One on the rebound. But AWS Man (also known as Bill) puts on the brakes as soon as he passes underneath the Dominican monk and slides to a stop. As soon as Friar lands and turns around, he gets booted in the gut; the Insane One then hooks his arms in a butterfly lock, and knees him hard in the face.]

Bill Hughes – Take That, Freakin' Subspace! Still don't understand the move name, but damn, it's fun to say!

Jack Gene – Friar looks like he's trying to get his wits about him after that knee just rattled his brains. He's stumbling back up, but AWS Man (also known as Bill) easily spins him around, and now is locking on an ab stretch. And … yes, he's going for a Mandible Claw at the same time, a favorite combo of AWS Man's.

Bill Hughes – Yeah, which Kronin completely ripped off from him last week in his match against Vyper. Oh sure, he claims to hate AWS Man soooo much, but he should thank him, because I bet he wouldn't have even won that match if it hadn't been for his move thievery.

Jack Gene – You can't really "steal" a move, it's not like they're copyrighted.

Bill Hughes – Intellectual theft, Jack. AWS Man's been disenfranchised. I demand reparations!

[Black Friar struggles in the move, too far away from the ropes to hope for a break. He tries walking forward, but the larger AWS Man (also known as Bill) keeps him held back with relative ease. Still favoring one leg, Father Nathan pounds the top turnbuckle and cheers for his partner from the apron, while Briskout looks on with a slight smirk on his face.]

Jack Gene – For a man who all of a sudden claims to be religious, Briskout seems to be enjoying the Friar's pain here.

Bill Hughes – Wouldn't you be if you were him? Friar told him he was unsavable and condemned him to hell! That's cold, Jack.

Jack Gene – Yeah, and AWS Man and Briskout seemed to be poking fun at that notion with their choice of theme music tonight. I somehow doubt he was taking the threat very seriously.

[Friar had began to slump towards the mat, but as the fans start to rally him on, AWS Man (also known as Bill) takes his eyes off his opponent to yell at them to "shut the freak up." Friar slowly begins to force his way back up to his feet, using his free arm to drive his elbow into the Insane One's abdomen several times. He then steps forward and drops down to his knees, which drives AWS Man (also known as Bill)'s chin into Friar's shoulder in a version of a jawbreaker. The Insane One stumbles backwards, making the tag to Briskout as he drops down and rolls out of the ring.]

Jack Gene – Really, AWS Man's already heading back to the apron, after one jawbreaker? I swear, for a Hall of Famer he is the laziest tag wrestler…

Bill Hughes – Hey, he's earned his paycheck for the night.

[Briskout runs in and tries to prevent Friar from making the tag, but the Spaniard is too quick for him, lunging to slap Nathan's hand. The Ace Superior champion climbs back into the ring and mows over Briskout with a clothesline, then another as Briskout gets back up, and a third for good measure.]

Jack Gene – Though it hasn't been that long since he's been in, Nathan's leg already seems to be feeling much better. Maybe there's something to your theory that God would fix it after all, Bill.

Bill Hughes – See? That should be illegal.

[As Briskout stands back up, more slowly this time, Nathan attempts a scissor kick, but Briskout moves out of the way and grabs him from behind in a rear waistlock. But before he can execute a German suplex, Nathan spins out of it and reverses into a waistlock of his own, then rolls Briskout over into a reverse jackknife cover. Law drops down for the cover. 1 … 2 … But Briskout kicks out with authority.]

Jack Gene – Nathan almost took Briskout by surprise there with a rollup pin.

Bill Hughes – Exactly, he needed the element of surprise. I think that Nathan's leg is still more hurt than he's letting on, and as soon as Briskout has a chance to attack it, he'll be in a bad way.

[Nathan whips Briskout into the corner and charges in for a splash, but Briskout dodges out of the way. Nathan manages to slow down enough and put up his arms to prevent himself from ramming into the corner full speed. As Briskout tries to approach him again from behind, Nathan catches him with a Pele kick. As the fans are still popping from that, Nathan jumps up and runs down the length of the ropes to clothesline AWS Man (also known as Bill) off of the apron, causing a bigger pop.]

Bill Hughes – Hey, now he's attacking innocent bystanders! Some man of God…

Jack Gene – Nathan's just getting to AWS Man first before AWS attempts some more shenanigans, which we all know he was about to if this match continued in Nathan's favor. Nathan turns back to get him some more of Briskout- Oh! But his attack on AWS Man cost him, as Briskout was able to just take out Nathan's leg with a running dropkick to the knee.

Bill Hughes – Hey, what goes around comes around. Nathan should've been taught that in vacation Bible school. I know I was … that, and something about some bearded guy who was in love with me. Sounded like a pedophile, now that I think about it.

Jack Gene – I really hope you're joking, Bill, for your sake.

[As Nathan lies on the mat holding his leg, Briskout runs up and delivers a couple vicious stomps to the head before covering him. Law makes the count. 1 … 2 … But Nathan kicks out, although somewhat weakly. Briskout picks up Nathan's leg and drags him by it over to his team's corner to tag in AWS Man (also known as Bill). With Briskout still holding the leg up, the Insane One launches himself over the top rope to come down on the elevated leg with a springboard leg drop. Nathan cries out with renewed pain and rolls around the ring as AWS Man (also known as Bill) seems to goad on the fans' boos.]

Bill Hughes – Look at that tag teamwork by the Flying Ninja Shark Popes! Amazing!

Jack Gene – That's not exactly their name, or names really. Although I don't know why I'm correcting you, since the real ones they chose are equally stupid. Call them whatever you want, I guess. I do have to admit they really seem to be gelling as a team, especially for their first outing.

[AWS Man (also known as Bill) rolls Father Nathan over, who had ended up facedown, and hooks the leg for a cover.]

Bill Hughes – This could be it!

[Law drops down for the count, checking the shoulder first. 1 … 2 … 3- But Nathan just barely kicks out. AWS Man (also known as Bill) runs his hands through his hair in momentary frustration, but soon stands up and begins delivering soccer kicks to Nathan's ribs.]

Jack Gene – Nathan really needs to escape this onslaught here. I hate to say it, but you were right about his leg still hurting from the beginning of this match. He probably shouldn't have been tagged back in so soon, but that ab stretch/mandible claw combination seemed to take a lot out of his partner.

Bill Hughes – Everything AWS Man does takes a lot out of you. Even if Friar does get tagged in, he'll just get beaten down again too. The God boys can't win this one.

[Chants for Father Nathan start up, which just cause the Insane One to point at the fallen priest and laugh. He allows Nathan to crawl a few feet towards his corner, before grabbing him by the legs to pull him back a little and applying a Mexican surfboard. AWS Man (also known as Bill) goes into a seated position as he pulls Nathan backward, and releases one of Nathan's arms so that he can wrap his own arm around Nathan's neck and trap him in a Dragon sleeper.]

Bill Hughes – Man, AWS Man's busting out the submission combos tonight! First his ab stretch/claw, which we haven't seen in a while, and now a surfboard/Dragon sleeper!

Jack Gene – I guess a pissed off AWS Man equals a submission-happy AWS Man. Makes sense, I suppose, if he's trying to make his opponents suffer more than they normally would. This move is putting pressure on both Nathan's injured legs and his neck, so the AS champ really can't afford to stay in this very long.

[Nathan continues to scream in agony, but soon begins taking advantage of his free arm to back elbow AWS Man (also known as Bill) in the face. Despite the protection of his paintball mask, after several shots the Insane One's hold starts to waver. Nathan breaks away, but seems to have spent all his energy escaping from the hold. AWS Man (also known as Bill) beats him to his feet and kicks him in the gut, then leads Nathan over towards his corner to tag in Briskout. Briskout starts to step into the ring, but the Insane One stops him and points to the top rope. Briskout looks confused, but shrugs and does as he's told while AWS Man (also known as Bill) bends down and lifts Nathan onto his shoulders in an electric chair position.]

Jack Gene – What is going on here…?

Bill Hughes – Looks like AWS Man's setting Nathan up for a Doomsday Device! I told you these two were a great tag team, now they're pulling out classic moves other teams made famous!

[But as Briskout climbs onto the top turnbuckle, Nathan begins raining right hands down on the Insane One's head. AWS Man (also known as Bill) stumbles forward, inadvertently driving Nathan's head into Briskout's crotch. Briskout grabs his particulars and slumps back on the turnbuckle as Nathan steps off of AWS Man's shoulders onto the middle turnbuckle, then kicks backward to catch the Insane One in the face and knock him to the mat. Finally, he lifts Briskout up and steps onto the top turnbuckle, hefting Briskout up in the process and tossing him overhead as he falls backwards with a super fallaway slam which throws Dr. Genocide right into his recovering partner. The fans explode, natch.]

Jack Gene – HOLY CRAP! Did you see that?!

Bill Hughes – Of course I saw it, Jack! Did you need any further proof that God is divinely interfering on Nathan's behalf?! No way he should have been able to do that with a bum leg!

Jack Gene – I thought you said he was just bluffing the leg being suddenly healed.

Bill Hughes – That was before! This time it really happened!

[The impact of having Briskout sail into him sends AWS Man (also known as Bill) rolling out of the ring. Meanwhile, Nathan and Briskout both flop around like fish out of water for several moments, but Nathan eventually begins flopping towards the general direction of his corner, like a somewhat intelligent fish out of water. As Nathan slowly inches towards the eager Black Friar, the Insane One climbs back onto his apron and starts yelling at Briskout to come tag him in. It's an agonizingly slow race against time as both men crawl towards their respective partners. Being closer to his own corner, Briskout is the first to make that last lunge and tag in AWS Man (also known as Bill), who scrambles into the ring and dives for Nathan. But it's too late, as Nathan makes the tag a split second later, and Friar leaps to the top rope to greet the Insane One with a flying crossbody as he charges across the ring.]

Bill Hughes – Nooooo! This puts them back on an even playing field.

Jack Gene – I thought you said that AWS Man would make short work of Friar when he-

Bill Hughes – Will you stop telling me things I said earlier?!

[AWS Man (also known as Bill) quickly pushes Friar off and scrambles up, only to get hit by a knife-edge chop and a dropkick to his unprotected forehead. He gets up once again, and is this time run down by a running flying clothesline. The Insane One stays down for more than a moment this time, giving Friar the opportunity to slide out onto the apron and spring off the top rope for a springboard Spiral Tap.]

Jack Gene – Friar calls that move Deis Irae, which means Day of Wrath! And AWS Man certainly felt his righteous wrath there!

Bill Hughes – I hate you so much right now…

[Friar initially rolled off of AWS Man (also known as Bill), holding his own ribs from the impact of the move. But he crawls back on top for the cover, which the fans count along with Law. 1 … 2 … 3- But the Insane One gets his shoulder up, much to the crowd's displeasure.]

Bill Hughes – Man, that was close. I'll give him his due, Friar's got some moves. But enough to put away the five-time GLC? We'll see about that. The more he flies around, the more prone he's going to be to crash and burn. That's why AWS Man usually just uses one high-flying move, the Win the Freakin' Matchifier, when he knows he's got his opponent all but beat.

Jack Gene – We'll see, but you and AWS Man had better hope Friar messes up soon, because I don't think the Insane One will survive many more moves like that last one.

[Black Friar picks AWS Man (also known as Bill) up to a standing position, but the Insane One suddenly pushes him away and delivers a Knock Your Freakin' Head Off out of nowhere. But Friar demonstrates his quickness once again by sidestepping the move and kicking the Hall of Famer in the gut, then hooking his arms in one fluid motion and snapping him to the mat with the Benediction (double underhook snap DDT).]

Jack Gene – My God, the Benediction! That's Friar's finisher, and it just came out of nowhere! He's making the cover, and this has got to be it!

Bill Hughes – WhattheIdon'teven…

[Law drops down to make the count as the fans asplode, for the second time. 1 … 2 … 3- But Josh Briskout comes diving in from off screen to break up the fall.]

Jack Gene – AWS Man's partner just saved him there, beyond a doubt.

Bill Hughes – Well then he's already proved himself to be a better partner than Adam Pyre. That guy couldn't save a seat at a movie theater.

Jack Gene – Really? That's what you're doing now? Terrible one-liners?

Bill Hughes – Badoosh ba.

[Nathan entered the ring as soon as he saw Briskout make a move, but wasn't quite fast enough to break up the fall. He nails Briskout with a running big boot, knocking Doc 'Cide out of the ring. Nathan follows after him to make sure he stays out. As AWS Man (also known as Bill) slowly stumbles up to his feet, Black Friar stalks him from behind, and grabs him for the rear naked choke that he calls Dominatus Veritas (absolute truth). He falls backwards with it to take the Insane One down to the mat, but his opponent rolls towards the ropes as soon as they hit the mat, grabbing on for a rope break.]

Jack Gene – Looks like Friar just tried to finish AWS Man with a submission there, but due to ring positioning, it was not to be.

Bill Hughes – Neither is a victory for them. Mark my words, the Popetopi will make a comeback.

[Black Friar is up first again and waits for AWS Man (also known as Bill) to stand. When he does, he gets whipped towards the turnbuckle, but the Insane One reverses it. Instead of colliding with the corner, Friar springs onto the middle turnbuckle and rebounds with a twisting crossbody, which AWS Man (also known as Bill) avoids with a baseball slide. He quickly regains his footing, and as soon as Friar stands he finds himself blasted with a Knock Your Freakin' Head Off.]

Bill Hughes – Boom, baby! Now that's how you do it! Game, set, and match.

[AWS Man (also known as Bill) fell down after executing his signature thrust kick, but he crawls over as quickly as his body will let him and drapes himself over Black Friar. The fans shower him with boos as Law makes the count. 1 … 2 … 3- But the fans' boos turn to cheers as this time it's Nathan who dives in and makes the save for his partner. But no sooner does he knock the Insane One off of Black Friar than Briskout reaches into the ring and drags Nathan back outside of it, where they resume their brawl.]

Jack Gene – Briskout and Father Nathan are having a knock down, drag-out fight out here right in front of us, but we can't really focus on that because the match could be decided at any moment in the ring!

Bill Hughes – I can easily watch both at once, but the action in the ring is just more interesting.

[AWS Man (also known as Bill) uses the ropes to pull himself to his feet. Leaning over the ropes and panting heavily, he yells down at Lilly to hand him Pen. His unwilling valet looks at him as if he's lost what's left of his mind, but the Insane One yells that he'll fire her if she doesn't do it. Lilly reluctantly stands and starts to hand the spatula up to him, prompting John Law to come over and start yelling at Lilly as well.]

Jack Gene – What in the world does AWS Man think he's doing?! This is literally exactly what cost him the Great Lakes title last week! I thought even he'd learn better than this.

Bill Hughes – Well, wait a sec, you don't know where he's going with this…

Jack Gene – I know exactly where he's going with it! He wants to hit Friar with Pen, even though that would be a blatant DQ and cost he and Briskout their first match!

[As Law threatens to eject Lilly from ringside while she tries to explain it wasn't her idea, AWS Man (also known as Bill) turns back to Black Friar just as he's getting up and nails the monk with a punt right to the twig and berries. This, of course, completely incapacitates Friar while the Insane One scoops him onto his shoulder and drives him into the mat with a Drop You On Your Freakin' Face (Emerald Fusion).]

Bill Hughes – …Hahahaha! You see?! I told you he was going somewhere with that! AWS Man didn't ever intend on actually using Pen, he just wanted Law occupied while he kicked a field goal right between the uprights.

Jack Gene – That is simply despicable.

Bill Hughes – But it worked, di'n't it?

[AWS Man (also known as Bill) looks down at Friar laid out on the mat for a moment, then heads to the nearest corner and shambles to the top. He steadies himself as he stands fully upright, looking down at his opponent with a gleeful look in his eyes.]

Bill Hughes – It's like I told you, he only goes for the Win the Freakin' Matchifier when he knows his opponent is incapacitated. Now THIS is game, set, and match.

Jack Gene – If he hits this, I'm sure you're right.

[Before he can fly off, Nathan jumps up onto the apron and tries to shake the top rope. But before he can dislodge the Insane One, Briskout runs by and kneecaps Nathan with a chair, knocking him from the apron. AWS Man (also known as Bill) regains his balance, and flies off with a beautiful Win the Freakin' Matchifier (shooting star press) onto Friar's prone body. Lilly sinks back onto her chair and glumly puts her chin in her hands as Law turns around and sees the cover, dropping down for the count. 1 … 2 … 3! The fans shower the ring with boos and a little trash, as Law lifts AWS Man (also known as Bill) up and raises his hand. Briskout hides the chair and slides in, getting his hand raised as well as he pats the Insane One on the back.]

Bill Hughes – Nice. NIIIICE!

Jack Gene – Nice? No. But it was impressive, regardless of how much they had to bend the rules in order to get the victory. Underhanded tactics aside, it's clear that AWS Man (also known as Bill) and Josh Briskout will be a force to be reckoned with in this tournament. Meanwhile, the Inquisition suffers a second tough loss. They'll need to make up some ground in order to get in this thing. But that's all for tonight. See you next week, sports fans!

[The scene fades.]

The Foxxy Grandpas rode a tandem bike down to the ring to the crowd's delight. This match went pretty quickly. Jade went straight after Tim Tyler, but Tim was able to keep himself away from her, tagging in his partner, Handlebeards. McGee showed some discomfort in his midsection, which the commentators speculated had to do with his match last week against BBW. Hecate was brought into the ring, and continued to concentrate on his ribs. Speaking of BBW, they came down to ringside. Tyler was able to make a hot tag, but the ref wasn't able to see it because of a distraction caused by John Bundy. Hecate tagged back in Jade and Jade ended the match with a submission. The Celestial Avatars d. The Foxxy Grandpas via submission.

After the match, Jade and Hecate clear the ring and head back. Meanwhile, BBW jumped into the ring. Tim Tyler tried to keep them away from Handlebeards, but they threw him to the outside. Bundy and Wire set up Handlebeards to go for the big splash, but then Lumberjack ran down. The crowd got on their feet to cheer for him. He slid into the ring and immediately clotheslined Bundy, sending him to the outside. Wire turned around, and he hit a big boot. As Wire tried to stand back up, Lumberjack grabbed him by the throat, and then slammed him with the Axe Chop. Bundy pulled Wire from the ring and helped him up the ramp. Lumberjack then hopped on the mic and said that he had an answer for Thad Williams. However, for him to give Thad what he wants, he wants something in return. A match against Bob Wire at Hardcore Hell. After what Wire did to him last week, it's time he chop, chop, chops Wire down for good.

Ambrose walked quickly to the ring. The commentators made mention that this was the third time we had seen him here in WMW. His last run saw him compete again Hecate for the Heartlands Championship. The match went pretty even going into the 4 minute mark. Ambrose was able to keep Kronin from using his high impact moves, keeping him close to the mat with his technical abilities. However, one false move later and Kronin had the advantage. He was able to overpower Ambrose and hit him with the Death by Metal piledriver for the pin. Kronin d. Arn Ambrose via pinfall.